Kyunki Fifth Years Bhi Kabhi Freshers The

Dear Freshers

Yes, this is how it feels to finally give up on IIT/PMT and every other dream career of your parent's choice and accidentally hitting  a jackpot by making it to one of the most prestigious and chilled out institution of the Country. Welcome to THE NLU.

Your parent's mantra during board exams must still be ringing in your ears " These are crucial years that will determine your whole life. work really hard now you can enjoy later". Trust me no one is going to ask your boards marks ever again, except few of your kamine friends. 

And the "later" that your parents were talking about is "NOW"

But before you start knitting dreams about  Bollywood style college life,

here are a few tips :-

1) First month is the BUMPER SALE SEASON for getting a girlfriend/boyfriend at discounted rate. Stock will be over before you can unpack your bags. So HURRY !!!*

*Conditions Apply

2) NLU Campus is strictly "No Alcohol Zone"! *

* ([ROABFL WBIOH AWIA] - Rolling On Acad Bloc's Floor Laughing With Beer In One Hand And Whiskey In Another)

3) Do Not Buy "MY 6 subject notebook". Trust me you wont use it. You can play  TIC TAC TOE in your smart phones only.

4) Maintaining a decent CGPA is very important but that shouldn't be the only thing you do here. To quote one of our Professor- " CGPA is like a Bikini beta, It shows you everything, but hides the most important assets".

 P.S: Do not take the platform in his class.

 5) Believe me it is really hard to Fail in this college. But with determination and consistency, nothing is impossible.

 6) 'Repeat' is like Heropanti here. Sabki Aati nahi, Aur kisi kisi ki Jaati nahi.

7) Courses are structured as per the availability of the faculty and not the other way round. Most faculty members are like those of Defense Against The Dark Arts. No one lasts longer than a year.

8) NLU people are ex officio brand ambassadors and official agent of National Handloom ( One stop shop for everything ranging from toilet paper to cooler) in Jodhpur. Dikhawe pe mat jao, apni akal lagao.

9) Compel your floor mates to buy their own bucket and broom and in some cases toothpaste and Deo. You might consider it frivolous right now  but very soon you will be moaning regretfully "NGS had warned me".

10) Be nice to Assholes in your batch. They will be the first one to get PPO's and Job.

PS: No offence

PPS: Unstoppable Offence, Immovable Defence. GAME ON.

 11) Dont get excited by the variety of dishes available in the menu. You will eventually survive only on chilli Aloo from one mess and Omelette from the other.

12) If you are a party animal, you are entering the Jungle here. Drink, Dope, have long poker nights, download torrent, access LAN, get food delivered in your room from Tuck shop and chill.You are in a holiday resort for 5 years.

For Inside details see here ;)

13) Apply in All the committees. It works like Government's ministry. Just like Smriti Irani in HRD , U can be in any committee irrespective of your lack of expertise in that field.

14) You are now our substitute to compulsorily attend all the conferences and seminars organised for God Knows who.

15) Acting ultra smart and over funny in first few weeks is quite natural, but everyone will know you -in and out- very soon so don't make a fool of  yourself by acting like Charlie Sheen when you know you are Alan at heart.

16) Never let this misleading thought linger in your mind - "Now I have an NLU Tag, my life is set". Getting a welcoming ENTRY here was a cake walk but a respectful EXIT is hard to earn.

Moreover never forget that Rahul Gandhi too has a Harvard and Cambridge Tag, if that helps. 

I had, once drawn an analogy between NLU and The Hunger Games, which is still relevant

• You were in the "Reaping"(Clat) as a result of ur rebellion against PCM/Bio.
• Everyone wants a show here.Wont mind setting oneself on fire.
• Best way to survive here is to make friends with the "Sponsors" (Placement people) who will provide you with in-game supplies (Internships).
• You will have to make friends with people who,you know will kill you at the right time.
• Rules of the games can change anytime ( Attendance fine,tests,and syllabus) 

So Guys. HAPPY HUNGER GAMES. MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOUR !!!