Farewell Blues 2015

After copying in around 162 continuous assessments and assignments, arranging at least 35 projects from various universities, faking all the vivas for the same and changing roll numbers in at least 25 Memos for CREs, here we are, 54 end terms down and just 6 more to go. As someone rightly said "Waqt aur Sanjay Dutt kab nikal jate hain pata hi nahi chalta".Time is almost there for gharwapasi and to bid farewell to friends with whom we spent half the decade doing literally nothing.

Now that even juniors have started getting jobs and are being “sold off” to top firms, embarrassed unemployed seniors are getting thrill out of the fact that “at least we ragged them once”. To hide the shame they are coming out with innovative paralegal business ideas like opening a laptop/mobile depository centre outside Supreme Court or a law firm called “ Try Legal” that will shortlist only the last rankers and give it a “try”. I kid you not, we even considered publishing a summary of Bangia called “Jhanghia” and are very optimistic about its sale. Depending on it's Success we might come up with summary of Bennion too called Baniyan, in collaboration with AKS. Jhanghia & Baniyan is all we’ll be left with, after college.

For many of us, future and life after college is still the least of all concerns because there is so much more to worry about before that. Have a look at some of the pressing issues.

1)       How to frame a wannabe funny e-mail invite for my last sem SDL party and try to sound funny without using Ganguli’s photo ?

2)      Should the theme be “No pants party” or simply no party ?

3)      What is a better option: Asking Amritambu to get us discount on booze from army canteen or to be on a safer side, simply mixing one RS bottle with fifteen buckets of Tang ?

4)       Should I google “ Tips to deliver an impressive farewell speech” and pretend that it is spontaneous or just pull out a drunk NAMO on Stage.

Girls have already bought and rejected 28 sarees for farewell and they will use all the negotiation skills they learnt in law school to convince their friends not to wear that off white chanderi rose butti saree because they might wear similar colour and design. After hunting for 69 dresses for conti and other random SDL parties, all over Lajpat nagar and Sarojini during internship, they have given up and are hoping that their search will end at “Search ends” in Sardarpura, Jodhpur.

 Boy’s on the other hand, have just two primary concerns:

1)       How to ask their crush to be their slaves

2)       How to avoid spending much on slave dinner.

It is that stage of life where we are too ashamed to ask money from parents but at the same time we also want to bid farewell to college life with a bang. To cover up the extra last Sem expenses of parties, conti, slave dinner, group trip, farewell and more parties, we go back to Vedas and realize the worth of all the books lying in shelf, untouched for years and start selling them one by one. Juniors have already called dibs on your furniture and other appliances while Madan Sa and Sanju have become extra friendly and made several visits to your rooms carefully examining all the items from cooler to mattress and even that Scooby doo boxer you left hanging in the cloth stand.

 Some 5^th years have even started regretting not being very nice to their immediate juniors coz now 4^th years have the power to fuck up their farewell night.
 Dear fourth years, always remember that with great power comes great party. In case you wish to organize a farewell for us in NLU’s traditional style (which is not mandatory, btw) I have a few tips and suggestions based on my personal views and experience:  

•   You have to be very vigilant about who are friends with whom during this sem to allot the group slot on stage while also dealing with weird specific demands of my batch mates.
        No, you cannot send all weirdoes together in one group irrespective of their bonding. Nope.
• Songs that you choose for intro must have some relevance to individual’s personality. No, I am not fine with you playing “ Buddha Hoga Tera Baap” for me. Sorry.

•  Do not kill each other for difference in opinion regarding the THEME of the farewell and don’t become 007 to keep it secret from other batches. Nobody gives a shit and majority doesn't even understand. No, “Brazzers” is not an appropriate theme for our batch. “Orgy” neither :|
•   Even honey Singh’s party chalti hai only “till six in the morning” so keep it short and try to wind up before sunrise, unlike us.
         No you won’t get attendance in Prateek sir’s class if you enter 5 mins late that morning.
•   No need to show extra affection and have 58 dance performances before each group. It’s like watching unwanted commercial between Sunny Leone’s video, that you can’t even skip. Unless there’s something extra ordinary or personal dedication, try not to bore people and don't extend time.
        No, you can’t have “what does the fox say” or “Kolaveri Di” this year too.
•  My heartiest sympathy to people in IT team, who have to  collect and compile all pictures and songs only to get scolded coz that favourite Shahrukh song u used for him was supposed to be for her. Moreover screen won't even be visible in daylight so all your efforts will be wasted.
  

        No u can’t click pictures on the spot and use it in a one slide ppt like I had to do for some. For those people who don’t share a single pic on social media you can always say” Selfie kheench ke phone pocket mein daal liya ? Kitne selfie-sh hain aap”
  
                                                     

Anyways it’s too early for our farewell , right now it's time to bid farewell to 2014. We have so many things lined up this last sem : Acad week, cul week, sports week, day Zero for junies, tests, end terms,moots and endless parties. In the end I would like to say that "It’s been a great year. Thank you for spamming my facebook wall by your photo collages that no one opened.

                                                                           Happy New year !